Theres A Weird Noise Coming From The Mens Toilet May 2026

There’s a Weird Noise Coming from the Men’s Toilet: A Guide to Diagnosis, Dread, and Damage Control

It starts subtly. A low groan. A wet, rhythmic thud. Or perhaps—and this is the one that stops your heart—a muffled voice that isn't quite English, singing a tune that doesn't quite exist.

“Jerry,” I said.

The last stall. The lock was rusted shut from the inside, though no one had been in there for hours. I knelt down. Pressed my palm to the cold tile floor. The vibration climbed up my arm, into my chest, and for a moment—just a moment—I heard something beneath the thrum. theres a weird noise coming from the mens toilet

• Crawl through the ceiling tiles to look down into the stall.
• Shout, “Hello? Is that you, Cthulhu?”
• Poke a coat hanger into the vent pipe.
• Drink the tap water to see if it tastes weird.

1. Contact a Plumber: If you're not sure what causing the noise, it's best to contact a professional plumber. They'll have the tools and expertise to diagnose and fix the issue.
2. Contact Building Management: If you're in a public building, contact the building management or facilities team. They may be able to send someone to investigate and fix the issue.
3. Avoid Using the Toilet: If you're concerned about the noise or the potential for the toilet to overflow, it's best to avoid using it until the issue is resolved.

Medium-term (by April 20):